The answer you get depends on the question you ask.

by | Nov 2, 2015 | Mindfulness, Personal Growth

I know, it’s pretty obvious, isn’t it…?

So, different questions…?

Just compare the following questions:

A. This isn’t working, so what’s wrong with me?
* The reason it’s not working is because there is something wrong with me and all I can do is find out what that is that is wrong with me…

B. This isn’t working yet, so how can I adjust what I’m doing to make it work?
* I’m already doing something and I need to find what to adjust and how to adjust it…

C. This isn’t working, so what steps do I need to take to make it work?
* I’m already doing something which isn’t quite getting the results, so what are other steps I could take to make it work…?

Spot the difference?

Or how is this example, especially for people who talk to themselves in a nasty voice:

A. How come you never finish anything…? What’s wrong with you?
* Again the answer can only be along the lines of what’s wrong.

B. You haven’t finished this thing yet, do you actually know how to finish it?
* Asks for skill/knowledge or lack thereof… You might surprised how often so-called procrastination in reality is a complete lack of ‘how to’… Which can be sometimes be quickly fixed: thank you internet, google and YouTube

C. You haven’t finished this thing yet, what needs to happen for you to finish it?
* Allows real exploration: It could be knowledge or a belief (e.g. I need to believe I can finish it), value, it’s actually not important enough, I don’t have the capabilities, I don’t know where to start or whatever else…

Hence the answers you get depend on the questions you ask!

Have a fabulicious week with great questions and even better answers!
Silke

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